Scroll down to see new entries (in bold)
April 28, 1986 (18 years old)
Published 19990101 by Digital Slob.
As a rule I skip school on Mondays, and this one started out as no exception.
But as editor of the school newspaper, I have responsibilities beyond beauty sleep. If I missed sixth-period journalism class today, we'd miss our appointment with the printer, and May's edition would be online-only.
And since I have on double-secret deep background that the Web's not going to get going until the late 1990s, this is what we in the newspaper biz would call "blowing deadline big time."
Complicating matters further, you can't check into school past third period, and as a truant I refuse to wake up earlier than half-past fourth.
So, to make deadline I had to sneak on campus, which proved deceptively more nuanced than simply sneaking off campus in reverse.
Vice Principal Powell nabbed me with the "Do you have a hall pass?" indictment. I pulled out a blank ad contract I keep on hand for emergencies and said I was out failing to get a hobby store to buy an ad for the next edition.
Smelling fear, he escorted me to class for confirmation.
"He says he was trying to sell an ad," Mr. Powell said, with a strong whiff of sarcasm.
Without missing a beat, my newspaper adviser said, "Curt, I told you not to come back here without selling that ad!"
She covered for me. Cool. That settles it. I'm majoring in journalism at college -- especially if none of the classes meet on Mondays.
But as editor of the school newspaper, I have responsibilities beyond beauty sleep. If I missed sixth-period journalism class today, we'd miss our appointment with the printer, and May's edition would be online-only.
And since I have on double-secret deep background that the Web's not going to get going until the late 1990s, this is what we in the newspaper biz would call "blowing deadline big time."
Complicating matters further, you can't check into school past third period, and as a truant I refuse to wake up earlier than half-past fourth.
So, to make deadline I had to sneak on campus, which proved deceptively more nuanced than simply sneaking off campus in reverse.
Vice Principal Powell nabbed me with the "Do you have a hall pass?" indictment. I pulled out a blank ad contract I keep on hand for emergencies and said I was out failing to get a hobby store to buy an ad for the next edition.
Smelling fear, he escorted me to class for confirmation.
"He says he was trying to sell an ad," Mr. Powell said, with a strong whiff of sarcasm.
Without missing a beat, my newspaper adviser said, "Curt, I told you not to come back here without selling that ad!"
She covered for me. Cool. That settles it. I'm majoring in journalism at college -- especially if none of the classes meet on Mondays.
4-minute reads
-
Click above to read my columns. Don't be afraid. It's just reading -- you're doing it now, only you scroll down a bit more and keep going. Think of it like a trip to the dentist. Apprehensive at first, but then there's laughing gas. Only you won't be spitting up swallowed blood once my hilarity subsides. If you are, let me know immediately, because that means I'm obviously doing something very, very wrong.
-
Download a better version of your life
Are we supposed to know what that icon above represents? I don't. But apparently, it's a link to my podcast feed.
-
Download the song everyone is talking about (if only to drown out the music).
-
All roads, and most chicklet icons, lead to iTunes, including the one above. Click it for the express route to becoming a digitialslobpod subscriber. Or click any other aggregator of choice below. Join the Digital Slob Cult. Don't worry, the doors all lock from the outside for your own protection.
-
The link above will get you to the digitalslob MySpace page. It must be worth a look, the chicklet is animated. There are only about 63 million other such MySpaces in captivity. But mine is one of the few that doesn't involve pictures of ass cleavage (I'm saving those for a premium service).
- Edit me!
Last posts
Archives
digitalslobpod will come to you
Ah, screw it. I'll just e-mail it to you
-
If you haven't figured all this podcasting crap out yet (and who has?) then just enter your e-mail address below and each weekly episode of digitalslobpod will arrive in your in-box, just like your horoscope and 1,017 would-be home mortgage lenders. But this won't generate any MORE spam ... I'm a Digital Slob ... I can't keep track of my electric bill -- how am I going to sort through your addresses?
Pretty picture of my wife. Actually, a realistic picture of my stunningly beautiful wife. If you scrolled down this far, I figured your eyeballs need a spa break. Actually, no, this is really just for me.
ATOM 0.3